Blue Jean Baby

Conservatively dressed columnist, George Will wrote a column last week stating that our love for denim clothes is "symptomatic of deep disorders in the national psyche." Will was responding to an article by Daniel Akst who wrote that denim is "insidiously effective at undermining national discipline." Will's lauding adulation over Akst was like that of a giggling bobby-soxer drooling on a photo of James Dean in tight jeans (I use that analogy as one that could be understood by a man of Will's age - which, I believe, is Pleistocene.)

I would like to have a few minutes with Mr. Will to ponder the troubles in the world; I mean the really bad troubles in the world. Let's start with the financial crisis. We don't even have to be partisan about this. Let's say it started with Reagan and deregulation or Clinton and Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac or George Bush or Wall Street or Goldman Sachs. The one thing all those people have in common is that, when they gunned down the world economy, they were wearing suits of fine silk or wool.

Oh, when George Bush was off cutting brush for six weeks at a time and leaving the country unattended, his crime of neglect was committed in denim. But in D.C., he and the remaining architects of doom: Cheney, Wolfowitz, Rumsfeld and the other henchmen, were clad in ties and jackets when they launched the shock and awe inspiring destruction of our reputation and our moral values - oh, and people's lives - through a mismanaged war, a policy of torture and the deconstruction of personal freedoms and the Constitution.

Perhaps George Will's tongue was in the vicinity of his cheek when he wrote that column, but he absolutely has missed the real joke, the dark humor in his words. He quotes Akst's statement that "Denim reflects 'our most nostalgic and destructive agrarian longings -- the ones that prompted all those exurban McMansions now sliding off their manicured lawns and into foreclosure.'" They look at the financial meltdown and see the source of it as people wearing jeans and wanting to own houses. Not the slick, sartorial slimeballs who ran the financial scams - it's the common people who are the problem.

Will calls on us to put away childish things, starting with denim. I think it is Will who has deep disorders in his psyche and should be put away.

I Did It My Way

Temporarily-President Bush's buddies belie belief that Cheney dicked up the first 4 years:

"One of the mythologies," Hadley said, "is that it was the vice president that somehow was pulling the strings on foreign policy in the first term and made it very ideologically driven and that somehow in the second term, the vice president's influence is in decline and, therefore, somehow the real Bush has come forward, and we have a more pragmatic foreign policy."

They put forth that the second 4 years were different than the first 4 (in sort of a reverse Old Testament/New Testament pattern). However they say Bush was just as responsible for the bad policy and screw ups of the first half of his administration as he is for those in the the second half. Glad they cleared that up.
"With friends like you, who needs enemas?" - G. W. Bush

YY U R, YY U B, I C U R YY 4 me

Alec MacGillis of the Washington Post has found a serious problem with Barack Obama's choices for the team that will help him govern:

"While Obama's picks have been lauded for their ethnic and ideological mix, they lack diversity in one regard: They are almost exclusively products of the nation's elite institutions and generally share a more intellectual outlook than is often the norm in government."

I agree. I know some smart people; some of my friends are intellectuals. But I wouldn't want one to marry my sister or be a Presidential advisor. Consider this telling point: "skeptics say Obama's predilection for big thinkers with dazzling résumés carries risks, noting, for one, that several of President John F. Kennedy's 'best and brightest' led the country into the Vietnam War." Yes, I prefer the C students and drop outs who led us into the glorious war in Iraq (which according to 5th-from-the-bottom-in-his-class John McCain, we are winning). "Douglas Baird, ...noted that whizzes can also have too much faith in their answers." That won't happen if we stick to imbeciles like Cheney and Bush who, when they decided to invade Iraq were open to listening to any advice that agreed with their determined goal.
Come on, please remember that the "failure of intelligence" which doomed Bush does not refer to some Ivy League smart guys making mistakes.

Not Right Notion?

I received this email yesterday:

Dear Fellow Blogger,
It is my distinct pleasure, as the president of Americans for Limited Government, to invite you today to become a key member of the exciting new conservative “bloggers central,” NetRightNation.com.
At ALG, we recognize the critical role you as a blogger play in gathering, assimilating, and disseminating news and commentary. And I, personally, am deeply grateful to you for taking the lead in fighting some of the most important battles our country has faced over the past decade, and more.

"Me?" I asked aloud as I turned around to see if they were addressing someone behind me, "invited to 'conservative bloggers central'?
Have they read my blog? Have they read this conservative view? Well, come to think of it, that is about limiting government - limiting their intrusion into someone's personal life. And I am all about limiting government by prohibiting participation by anyone named Bush, Cheney, Rove, Alberto Gonzales, Wolfowitz, Rumsfeld......
So I guess my "fellow bloggers" at NetRightNation are hitting their target market with the email.

R E S P E C T - Find Out What it Means To Me.

In case no one picked up on this the past few months, I wanted Barack Obama to win the election. I went so far as to vote for him: just doing what I could to help the man out. What a wonderful acceptance speech it was, espousing

“a desire to move beyond the bitterness and partisanship of the recent past.
Our nation must rise above a house divided. Americans share hopes and goals and values far more important than any political disagreements. Republicans want the best for our nation. And so do Democrats. Our votes may differ, but not our hopes…Two hundred years have only strengthened the steady character of America. And so as we begin the work of healing our nation, tonight I call upon that character. Respect for each other. Respect for our differences. Generosity of spirit. And a willingness to work hard and work together to solve any problem…I was not elected to serve one party, but to serve one nation. The president of the United States is the president of every single American, of every race and every background. Whether you voted for me or not, I will do my best to serve your interests, and I will work to earn your respect.”

Oh, wait, that was George Bush’s acceptance speech in 2000. Later he claimed to “have a mandate” (from the fewer than 50% who voted for him?) and that he had earned “some political capital…and I intend to spend it.” He was so partisan and divisive, that the defeat of his party was assured this year, no matter how old and pathetic a guy they dragged out to try and get our sympathy.
I hope that Barack Obama can stick to his promise. I believe he intends to – I wonder about the Democrats in Congress. I hope that those Republicans or others who would like to see him fail can somehow rise above those feelings and try to help the country move forward and become a better version of ourselves.
Personally, I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself without Sarah Palin to mock. For a few weeks I’ve got college football to occupy me, but then what? It may take her months to resurface in the news and will people take her seriously enough to make her actions mock-worthy? I know, I should rise above it, but as my friend, Mary Tom, said, “(Mocking Sarah is) harder to quit than a bad crack habit.” I don’t know how hard quitting crack is, I haven’t tried to quit, but putting down the Palin pipe is tough.
Jason Henderson has given me permission for one day to savor: “Republican brothers and sisters are very hurt and afraid, so after this celebration we should spend some time showing them we're interested in making a better world, and not dancing in the end zone. But 24 hours is a decent time to dance.” So get a load of this: “One night, Steve Schmidt and Mark Salter went to her hotel room to brief her. After a minute, Palin sailed into the room wearing nothing but a towel.” Wow. Which one is gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that), Schmidt or Salter? Did someone complain about that or were they just…um…revisiting the image later and got caught?
The real bad part of the article is about Palin’s spending money buying up clothes for the family like Nieman Marcus was her back-to-school, shopping source. Well, that, and the going rogue with the Ayers thing.
She really was unprepared and unqualified to be on a National ticket.
But I’m putting all that aside now. I would be happy to meet with her anytime, anyplace and show her my respect and my desire to work together in a towel.

Hey, don’t forget to enter the contest in the previous entry below.

Sympathy for the Devil

Scott McClellan figured it would be fitting to talk about his new book at a press conference today.
INTRODUCER PERSON: Ladies and gentlemen, former White House press secretary, Scott McClellan will now take questions.
REPORTERS (SHOUTING): I wanna hear my voice! I wanna hear my voice!**
McCLELLAN: Yes, you.
REPORTER: Mr. McClellan, your book states that Bush is self-deceiving and runs the government on propoganda.
McCLELLAN: That is the message that we have decided on, yes. You will hear my publicist, my manager, my agent and all my hangers-on parroting the same talking point.
REPORTERS (SHOUTING): I wanna hear my voice! I wanna hear my voice!
McCLELLAN: Yes, you.
REPORTER: Mr. McClellan, according to MSNBC's report, your book says, quote, "that Bush and his team sold the Iraq war by means of a 'political propaganda campaign' in which contradictory evidence was ignored or discarded, caveats or qualifications to arguments were downplayed or dropped and 'a dubious al-Qaida connection to Iraq was played up.'" Since that war destroyed this country's reputation and standing in the world, hamstrung our military, ruined our economy and cotinues to bring about death and injury, do you even feel any regret about your part in spreading the propoganda?
McCLENNAN: That is part of an ongoing investigation and I can not comment on that.
REPORTER: A follow up: Does the fact that you are bringing this out now, so much later, only to make money off this heinous situation... does that make you the lowest, most dispicable sort of human being imaginable (other than your former bosses)?
McCLELLAN: That is part of an ongoing investigation and something which I can't comment on.
REPORTER: Um, follow up to the follow up: Scott, do you even have a soul?
McCLELLAN: Again, that's part of an ongoing investigation and something I really can't say. Though it seems unlikely.
INTRODUCER PERSON: That's all we have time for. Thank you ladies and gentlemen. No more questions.
(McClellan was merely a a tiny imp in Bush's underworld of demons like Karl Rove and Dick Cheney, but if I had no respect for him when he was Bush's spokesdummy, I have even less now. Here's the really funny follow-up, though: McClellan's book tells about how Bush establishes the talking points and everyone is told the script and you hear them all repeat it like Stepford brides of Frankenstein. Now the White House is denying that what Scott says is true and expressing sadness over his "disgruntlement": they all are saying it with exactly the same line, "this is not the Scott McClellan I knew." Which is probably true because I suspect that anyone leaving the Bush White House early is killed and replaced with a pod person.)

Remember, the letters in "George W. Bush" spell "We bugger hos"

**Any comedy format ripped off from Gary Burbank is purely intentional

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Delayed On Hold

Recently White House spokesman, Scott McClellan seemed to try to distance the President from Tom Delay, the embattled House Majority Leader. McClellen said that Bush and Delay are friends but that “there are different levels of friendship”. He said that the two are “working friends” not close friends.
Bush then invited Delay aboard Air Force One and to attend a White House event on social security, and said of the Congressman “I appreciate his leadership.” What is the relationship between Bush and Delay? I tried to call Scott McClellan to find out, but I got put on hold:

OPERATOR
You have reached the office of White House spokesperson, Scott McClellan. Mr. McClellan is out at a spinning class, but your call is important to us -- unless you are a member of the liberal press. Please hold and Mr. McClellan will talk to you out of the next available side of his mouth.

MUSAK (YOU’VE GOT A FRIEND)
When your job’s in trouble, and you’re feeling some despair
And the political noose, is getting a little tight
Use my name and mention me, but don’t expect me there
I’m behind you, out of range of the T V lights

Though I call you a friend, I just give it a little spin
We’re not close, we’re
Just working friends

OPERATOR
You have reached the office of White House spokesperson, Scott McClellan. Mr. McClellan is busy dodging calls from Mr. Delay’s office, but your call is important to us -- unless you are a certain Senator who’s name rhymes with Voin-a-bitch. Please hold and Mr. McClellan will deliver you his next available equivocation.

MUSAK (BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER)
When you’re nearing, a big fall
Your ethics are on trial, I’ll hem and haw
I’m on your side, unnnn-til times get tough, and friends just can’t be found
Like a bridge closed for flooding waters, I will let you drown

OPERATOR
You have reached the office of White House spokesperson, Scott McClellan. Mr. McClellan is out at a side-stepping class, but your call is important to us -- unless you are opposed to the culture of life. Please hold and Mr. McClellan will blow you his next available smoke.

MUSAK (DON’T STAND SO CLOSE TO ME)
Delay is the subject
Of ethics scrutiny
And Bush tells the press that
“Tom’s a good friend to me”
But later, in private
Here’s what Bush tells Delay
We’re friends and I like you
But not that special way

Don’t stand, don’t stand so
Don’t stand so close to me…….

At this point I decided to hang up.