Monday, April 7, 2008

Project Run Away

bush_queer_eye.jpgProject Runway is prancing over to Lifetime after its next season. This is just wrong; Lifetime is a channel for women while Bravo is for everyone....everyone who likes watching shows with gay people - of which Project Runway has a fabulous assortment. Having Project Runway on Lifetime would set societal acceptance of homosexuality back ten years to a time when women kept all the secrets of gay men to themselves. (By the way, I am heterosexual, which I know, not because I am married - that proves nothing, just ask the former governor of NJ - but because I do comedy and I have the hots more for Nina Garcia than for Michael Kors)
But Bravo is there to make men like me comfortable with the gayness in our environment, hence, "Queer Eye For the Straight Guy." My only problem with that show was that they pushed men to use feminine (by which I mean excessive) skin care products.
Things like exfoliants. Has anyone here been alive long enough to remember the Viet Nam war? Forget that, did anyone here stay awake long enough in history class to learn about the Viet Nam war?
In Viet Nam they used Agent Orange as an exfoliant to take the leaves off trees to get rid of sniper hiding places. That’s all I know about exfoliants.
And women have too many kinds of soap. Men need only two kinds: soap soap and shampoo, and, really, I suspect we could get by with just one, but Proctor and Gamble has convinced us we need to get rid of dandruff to attract women.
Women don't use soap soap. You give a woman a bar of Ivory soap to wash her face and she’ll recoil at the thought that it might damage her skin.
Right. She'd use agent orange on her skin but she's afraid of soap? I don't understand women. That's why I need Bravo as a bridge channel to understanding. Project Runway should stay put.

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