Hot Freak Style News – Oslo, Norway – Sources inside the Norwegian government are reporting that Barack Obama will take over as King of Norway on January 1, 2010. The story is being reported by the AP, on CSPAN and in the Oslo Enquirer. President Obama has flown to Norway is is thought to be finalizing the deal today.
Speculation has centered around Obama for weeks as Norway seeks to replace their current monarch and return to a role as a world leader in inspirational speeches. Obama has succeeded at every level of government in speaking eloquently and intelligently, most recently restoring the Democratic Party’s goal of having a health care reform bill brought to the brink of success before its expected failure on a national stage at the end of the year. Obama is also known to be at odds with American freedom and democracy, aspiring instead to rule as a benevolent Socialist monarch.
Other world leaders have been mentioned as candidates for the Norway job. Hugo Chavez has managed to get Venezuela mentioned prominently in world news recently but his reliance on fear and intimidation is thought to be inconsistent with Norway’s ideals. Moammar Khadafi was thought to be the favorite at one point but his failure to deliver a coherent speech at the UN last year dropped him from consideration.
Obama did agree to a four-year contract with the United States just over one year ago. However, his contract had an escape clause if the Norway Throne were offered to him. The King of Norway is considered the pinnacle of government leadership among rulers in the Western hemisphere.
Cabinet members were expecting Obama to speak with them directly about the move in a private meeting before the official announcement. However, Obama left for Norway without having such a meeting. Some of the cabinet members were recruited by Obama’s predecessors, most by Bill Clinton, and, while they hold an allegiance to President Obama, they are not as emotional about it as those members recruited by Obama himself. Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner broke down in tears when asked his reaction to the expected announcement.