Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread

Passover ended at sundown today and we had pizza for dinner, as Rabbi Bar Toli instructed, "You shall eat it (the Passover reprieve) with tomato sauce and cheese."

We used to bake up a homemade pizza, which was delicious but disappointed Allie - she always wanted Papa John's. Naturally we forced her to have the homemade because we hated her and were always looking for ways to cause her misery.

Allie was unhappy with pretty much everything about Passover. She loved (still does) pasta and bread. "Why does Passover have to be about bread?" she whined, "Why can't it be about pork chops?" We still haven't told her that Passover doesn't really exist: that we conspired with millions of people all over the world to create a "religion" we called "Judaism" just so we could invent "Passover" and make Allie go a week without spaghetti and garlic bread. We hate her that much.

Karen and I like bread also, and 8 days without it gives us serious cravings. I have friends who say they like matzah. I like it too, but when it is the only choice, you realize that it is dry, tasteless crackers. So we are ready for celebratory pizza when the big day comes.

Since Allie is away at college, we don't have to make the nasty homemade stuff and we decided to go out - but not for Papa John's, since their crust is more tasteless than matzah. We went to La Rosa's to get their pan crust pizza. Pan crust because after 8 days of crackers you don't want the thin crust.

Our pizza arrived and we took big, delectable bites of real bread. But something was not quite right. The pan crust was flat and doughy. Our waitress explained that sometimes they get a batch that just doesn't "fluff up". The bread did not rise. We were experiencing the 9th day of the bread of affliction.

I know. It's karmic payback for all the suffering we put our daughter through.


Susan said...

Mmmmmm. Pizza. Sad about the crust though.

P.S. Typo in the 2nd paragraph. "We used bake up a homemade pizza"

JohnnyB said...

I fixed the typo - thanks!
As for the flat crust, I went to Penn Station to get a Philly cheese steak on crusty bread to make up for it (for lunch today, not after the pizza dinner).

Anonymous said...

At least, you're not Catholic. Those wafers, I tell you. Why couldn't Christ come in the form of chocolate? Hmmmmm. I'll have to write the Vatican and see if they can change that since they're so flexible like that on things. ;)

Cali said...

I'm sure Allie realizes that you only 'hated' her because you love her. It was funny to read though.

Jenny said...

Very funny! I think a week without leavened bread calls for a week full of leaven!

Jen said...

Your pizza picture appears to have ham in it, har har har.

JohnnyB said...

Rambler - There was some controversy about a chocolate Christ statue last year wasn't there? I think a chocolate Host would go over, especially at Easter!

Cali - remarkably, Allie still keeps in contact with us. :-)

Jenny - right on! I had another bready sandwich for lunch today.

Jen - I was looking for a vegie but this was the most appetizing pizza picture I could find in a very quick search. Anyway, our family eats pork - though we usually have ham on pizza only with pineapple